Current state of emotion: A fucking whirlpool.

It’s been a bad year built of wrecked emotions, negativity, and disappointment. Today is especially hard. I feel like a drowning fish. Stuck and sinking deeper and deeper into the dark. It’s not a good place to be. I need to get out. 

I am miserable. 

2013, you’ve been my year of bad luck. Fuck you. 

My happiness is not going to depend on this previous year. I’m going to tackle my fears and take responsibility. I want to earn enough money to get out of living with my parents. I don’t want to see any more of their disapproval. I am in school and learning, so I don’t need them to monitor whether I’ve eaten or gotten things done. I pay my credit card bills and fill up my own tank. They’ve been so negative and never encouraging. Fuck that. I need encouragement and inspiration. I can never find that here. In this family. In this small town. I have to leave.